Past fears and pain works in funny ways. Everything can be completely fine in the present, but because you’ve experienced pain before, you know damn well that it’s still a possibility for it to present itself again. Whether or not there is a probable chance of re-encountering this painful experience in the present is of little significance. What matters most is not the myriad of other twists and turns your life can take for the better, but that the pain is still out there. Knowing this makes it real. Knowledge of past pain becomes a parasite to your present condition; if not physically, then simply a mental roadblock that you cannot seem to get rid of.
I guess we can find solace in knowing that life always has several paths it can take, and not just the one that is clearest to us.
by Jason Lam