THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR SOMEONE

The best thing you can do for someone is to help them navigate their life. I believe we all have a fundamental desire for mentorship and guidance. We all want to be better everyday, and we all would love a little bit of roadside assistance along the way. Everybody’s trying to get from point A to point B, whether it’s mentally, physically or emotionally. Everybody’s searching for something. Help them find it.

Remember, just because something comes easily to you, doesn’t necessarily mean it comes easily to others. You’d be surprised to find how much others may appreciate your expertise in something that seems almost second nature to you.

Don’t know what you’re good at? Answer these questions:

• What do people compliment you most for?

• How do your friends introduce you?

• What have you been prized for in the past?

• What do you find ridiculously easy, but others find incredibly difficult?

In “Never Eat Alone,” author Keith Ferrazzi states that the best areas to help people are in health, wealth and their children. If you don’t know where to start, start there.

Here are a few things I know I’m good at and willing to help with:

• Photography

• New Style Hustle

• Traveling on a budget

• Writing

• Making people laugh with my really bad jokes

I know some of you may be thinking, “Why should I help others? I worked really hard to get to where I am and to know what I know now. I’m not just going to give it all away for free!” But here’s the thing, you’re not giving it away for free. Life is not a zero-sum game. You don’t lose anything because someone else benefited from you. While you may not see immediate results for your help, your generosity always comes back to you tenfold. Hoarding all your chips like Scrooge McDuck just makes you an asshole, and you’re not an asshole, right?

Some others may also be thinking, “Well, I don’t want to seem like I’m bragging by giving unsolicited advice! I’ll really look like an asshole then!” There’s a difference between offering help to just anybody walking down the street and helping those who are clearly in need. I’m talking about the latter. Ever fall flat on you face only to open your eyes and see that there was already a helping hand reaching out to pick you back up? You’re not bragging. You’re not showing off. You noticed someone was in need of help, and you offered a helping hand. You’re not an asshole. You’re a freakin’ super hero.

All I’m saying is whenever you see a friend in need, reach out a helping hand and see what you can do. It doesn’t have to be much, but a little bit goes a long way. We all know that. You didn’t get to where you are today all by yourself, did you?

There are two types of people in this world as we continue building our castles in the sand. There are those who sit back and relax as soon as they get their castles built, and those who view their success as an opportunity to help others build their castles as well.

What kind of person do you want to be?

I hope you’re not the one who will just sit back as soon as you have yours. I understand; it’s not your problem, it’s theirs. But I’m a firm believer that one’s success is your success, and another’s failure is also your failure. We’re more connected than you realize. And believe it or not, the person who is greedy and hoards all his knowledge and resources always gets his castle knocked down first. Don’t ask me why. The world just seems to work that way.

And for those of us who are in need of a little help; I understand, we all have big egos, and we’re all quite wary of admitting we are a little lost. However, the first step in making any sort of progress is admitting that you are indeed lost. When you have the courage to do so, lo and behold, there will be a helping hand reaching out and ready to pick you right up.

Ultimately, I’m a firm believer that if you’ve had the opportunity to acquire knowledge that could be of benefit to others, then it is your duty to give back and make sure you share that knowledge with as many people as possible.

So, what skills do you have? And how can you best utilize your skills to help someone navigate their life today?

This is why I write this blog. I want to help you navigate your life. I want to help you reach the highest version of yourself by sharing the knowledge I’ve gained in this great journey of ours, and I hope it inspires you to do the same.

by Jason Lam

IN THE NOT SO DISTANT FUTURE

In the not so distant future, 99 percent of our jobs will be replaced by robots, but the one thing that will set yourself apart is your voice. All skills are capable of being replaced, your voice, however, cannot be replaced – at least not yet. Your story cannot be replaced. The way you do things you do and why you do what you do cannot be replaced.

In the not so distant future, everybody will have to strengthen their voices. The resume will be dead. If you don’t have a blog, YouTube channel, or some sort of media outlet that lets your employers find out a little more about who you are as a human being, then you’ll be out of the race. Why? Because nothing will differentiate you from the robots doing exactly what you’re doing, but better, faster and cheaper.

In the not so distant future, our bios will no longer just be our names, where we’re from, and what schools we’ve attended. When people click the “About Page” on our blog, (because you have one now), it tells us your story of origin, what motivates you, and ultimately what in the world you are doing here and why we should care.

In the not so distant future, traveling will be a requirement. It is your duty to travel and see as much of the world as you possibly can. It is a crime not to. You live in the most abundant time in the world. We have planes that fly across the sky at 600 miles per hour and can get you halfway around the world in less than 24 hours. If you aren’t traveling and opening your eyes as much as you can, then what are you doing?

In the not so distant future, being as human as possible will be all the rage. That means hanging out with your friends in person. Handwriting letters. Not giving any fucks about likes and followers. And being really damn emotional. The curated facade of perfection the Internet allows will come crashing down, and we will be left with nothing but humans. I can’t wait.

In the not so distant future, you will have to break down that perfect facade of yours and tell your story. You will have to express your true self. If you don’t, you won’t be able to tell yourself apart from that robot sitting right next to you, which will inevitably lead to a psychotic meltdown and lead to questions like, “Am I really human? Or am I just another robot?” But you are a smart human being, and you are reading this so you won’t let that happen.

In the not so distant future, we will all be storytellers.

What to do?

Start expressing yourself now. No, I don’t mean with cars, clothes and million-dollar homes. I mean with your voice. Write your thoughts down on a napkin. Start a blog. Hop on that dance floor. Be yourself. Love yourself. Tell your story. Start now, and get used to it. That’s all we got. We have robotic arms and legs that can do all the moving for us now. We have computers to crunch all the numbers and billions of other smartphone applications to do all the thinking for us. There is nothing, however, that can come up with a story that is as unique as your life. Then again, none of that matters if you don’t speak up. So speak up! Your future depends on it.

by Jason Lam

WE JUST WANT TO HANG WITH THE COOL KIDS

Stop all this talk about finding your passion / doing what you love / doing work that gives your life meaning. If we really get down to it, we just want to hang with the cool kids. 

When we were children in the playground, we looked around at the yard, figured out who’s having the most fun, and jumped in. During my time, it was basketball, dodgeball, hopscotch, kickball, pogs, digimon, and, of course, tag. It was that simple. I wanted to hang with the kid with the Lunchables. I wanted to play tag with the kid getting chased by all the girls. I wanted to be with the cool kids.

These days, the cool kids seem to be the models, the professional athletes, designers, photographers, and – who would’ve thought – even techies are cool now. So now we have all these people that are unhappy because all of the sudden, there isn’t enough space on the playground. The “cool” section has reached full capacity and, unfortunately, you were not picked. Sorry, you have to work as an accountant, a secretary, a receptionist, a waiter, or a retailer at some dead-end company. [Cool points extremely lacking.]

The reality is there isn’t enough space for all of us to hang out with the cool kids. That's why there’s all this anxiety about work-life balance, why there is an over-consumption of self-help books, and the reason why the term “FOMO” even exists. Forget passion, forget meaning, you’re just upset because you can’t hang with the cool kids.

The funny thing is the cool kids aren’t defined by the activity, it’s defined by the people. I’m sure you’ve met actors, models, photographers, and designers who really weren't that cool. So who’s to say you can’t be the coolest accountant, or the coolest waiter, or the coolest receptionist? Are you really responding to the fact that models, photographers, professional athletes, and artists are cool? Or are you reacting to the facade that the media presents to us? Speaking from personal experience – photoshoots really aren’t that exciting, movie sets aren’t any different, and I’ve met some models who really just didn’t give a fudge. How about that? You work all your life searching for the golden ticket only to find out that the chocolate factory doesn’t have any chocolate in it.

LAME.

Lucky for us, unlike the playground, we’re not the only kid who wasn’t chosen to be on the team. A bunch of us have been “left out” so to speak; who’s to say we can’t band together and start our own club of “Cool Kids”? At the end of the day, it’s not even about being cool. It is, however, about being comfortable with who you are wherever you are. That’s an entirely different type of cool in itself. 

We just want to hang with the cool kids. But who’s to say you’re not already a cool kid?

by Jason Lam

SOLO EXHIBITION: STREET DANCE PROJECT

Just finished a huge piece at The Spot Dance Center with pictures from the STREET DANCE PROJECT series.

For this piece, instead of spending thousands of dollars getting framed exhibition quality art prints, we decided to go with the traditional wheatpaste technique most street artists use when bombing the streets of New York. It is imperfect, spontaneous, and even messy at times, but seeing that this is a documentation of street dancers, it was only appropriate to stay within the realms of street art. 

Special thanks to Robyn for the opportunity of sharing my gift with the very people that inspired it. 

THE ONE THING PEOPLE WANT THE MOST OUT OF LIFE

I think, at least based on my experiences thus far, that the one thing people want most is the feeling of being alive. I think when people say they want to live a happy life, this is what they mean -- TO FEEL ALIVE. This is why we enjoy hanging out with our friends, family, and loved ones. Despite each one of us being different individuals, it is those differences that bring out and further enhance a part of us that we may not even know existed or we feel is suppressed. In this way, the people we surround ourselves with make us feel whole and capable of being more than what we are or at least wish to be. We feel more complete and this makes us feel alive.

This is why we love sports. When we are pushing ourselves to run faster, jump higher, and hit harder, which leaves us with aching muscles, puffing for air, and thirsting for water, we are reminded that we are human, and we feel alive. If we were denied this natural privilege to exercise our inherent capabilities, it would be an act that goes against the desire to feeling alive, an act that takes away happiness.

Deep down, we all know this. Unhappiness is evident when the teacher gives us a time out, and we’re stuck sitting in the corner while all your friends get to play. It is evident when our boss doesn’t allow us to voice our opinions. It is evident when the people we care about ignore us. We are being denied the chance to test our natural limits, denied the right to feel whole and all of what we can be, and denied the privilege of feeling alive.

Ever wonder why we love to watch heartbreaking movies? It's because they allow us to feel fleeting happiness, detrimental sadness and everything else in between. We’re allowed to feel our full range of emotions at no real cost aside from time spent sitting in front of the television.

Imagine if someone told you that you’re not allowed to love anymore...

Feeling alive requires fulfilling our spectrum of natural abilities. When we can’t stand eating the same food, can’t manage doing the same mundane activity, or seeing the same person for prolonged periods of time, it is not because we lack discipline. It is because we understand that there are other aspects to our lives that we must not neglect. Too much time and energy spent here, is not enough spent elsewhere. We need a balanced variety of people, activities, emotions, etc. It’s a necessity.

Unfortunately, feeling alive is the exact opposite of how typical companies function nowadays. You have to stay in your cubicle from 9-5 with no freedom to move, and you have to do as your boss says with no freedom to speak or to be heard. You have to stick to one career path, and you have to specialize in one thing and stick with it for the rest of your life. Talk about an unbalanced diet...

And we wonder why stress and depression is the No. 1 disease we have in modern society today?

I’m not advocating a revolution, or quitting your job, but I am saying to allow yourself the privilege of feeling alive. So what makes you feel alive?

    Is it dancing the night away?
    Is it singing at the top of your lungs?
    Is it taking your dog to the park?
    Is it staying up all night talking with your mom?

And if you’ve forgotten, here’s a few tips:

    It gives you goose bumps.
    It makes you smile like no other.
    Time flies.
    You look forward to it.
    It makes you feel absolutely amazing.

I want to feel alive and I want to live a life surrounded by people who feel the same.

by Jason Lam

HOW TO FIND OUT WHO YOU REALLY ARE

On the last day of class of my final year in college, my screenwriting teacher, Kris Young, (who I swear is the reincarnation of Confucius because of his wisdom) takes a breast pump out from his bag and places it on the table. Now, I don't really know how those things work, but he instructs us to be quiet as he hits the 'ON' switch, which then fills the room with a low mechanical hum. After a confused couple of minutes, he turns it off and tells us to say what we heard. 

The actual answers didn't matter. What mattered was that WE ALL HEARD SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

And so the last thing I learned in college, which I still remember to this day, was not about all the technicalities of creativity. It was the fact that WE ALREADY HAVE A UNIQUE VOICE, and the best thing we can do as artists is to stay true to it.

The problem is we don't realize or forget that we already have what it takes, and I admit it is easy to forget when you're constantly being critiqued by those around you.

So how do we re-discover our voice among all this noise?

The first thing that comes to my mind is to tell you to immediately turn off your computer, buy a plane ticket, and go somewhere you've never been before, but I know that wouldn't work, at least not yet. Before I start offering suggestions, let's talk about why "finding yourself" is so difficult in the first place.

We are social beings. Our identities are formed not just by the DNA that has been passed onto us, but also by the environment that we grew up in. Now, we know that we are individuals and we can differentiate between “I” and “You,” but much of our identity is actually a reflection of other people. Think about it, we play basketball because our friends play basketball, and we find a job, get married and have children because that's what everybody else is doing. "If they are this way, then I should be this way." We go with the flow because human beings naturally take the path of least resistance. Plus, it feels good to have a sense of belonging. Why cause a ruckus by quitting your job and telling all your friends that you're sick of capitalism and would rather live on a farm out in some remote location in Europe? (ahem*)

It can become difficult to live in a community and maintain a sense of individuality. This issue is precisely why fashion is so popular. It's the easiest way to appear different (despite the fact that in reality, we all know you bought that sweater at American Apparel, hipster!). But I digress… 

We already have a unique voice, but when we're trying to find the balance between fitting in and still being an individual, our voice can often get misplaced. There are usually millions of different voices swimming inside our heads telling us what we should and should not do. When this happens, we must relocate it by removing all other voices by... you guessed it, changing your surroundings (don't buy your plane ticket yet, but start thinking about where to go).

Change your surroundings. Travel. It is only through traveling and deliberately placing yourself in an unfamiliar environment that allows you to finally see yourself clearly. A cat among a pack of dogs. Because you are in a new environment, free from the pressure and expectations from before, you can do what you want. You can have a fresh start. The interesting part that then helps you re-discover who you are is what you hold onto in this new environment, and what you let go. Finally, through spending time in a different place, and “trying on” new identities like how you try on a new sweater, you get to look back and see how far you've come. By making the effort to find yourself, you can now compare your new self with the old. 

Our identity can then be thought of as pieces of luggage. What do I need? What can I leave? What did I think I need but actually didn't? What made my trip worse? What did I forget to bring that would've made my trip better? And lastly, what are the things I absolutely could not live without?

Through this long journey that can last for an entire lifetime, we can finally return home with what is most important to our essential self, which is, of course, our true self.

by Jason Lam