THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR SOMEONE

The best thing you can do for someone is to help them navigate their life. I believe we all have a fundamental desire for mentorship and guidance. We all want to be better everyday, and we all would love a little bit of roadside assistance along the way. Everybody’s trying to get from point A to point B, whether it’s mentally, physically or emotionally. Everybody’s searching for something. Help them find it.

Remember, just because something comes easily to you, doesn’t necessarily mean it comes easily to others. You’d be surprised to find how much others may appreciate your expertise in something that seems almost second nature to you.

Don’t know what you’re good at? Answer these questions:

• What do people compliment you most for?

• How do your friends introduce you?

• What have you been prized for in the past?

• What do you find ridiculously easy, but others find incredibly difficult?

In “Never Eat Alone,” author Keith Ferrazzi states that the best areas to help people are in health, wealth and their children. If you don’t know where to start, start there.

Here are a few things I know I’m good at and willing to help with:

• Photography

• New Style Hustle

• Traveling on a budget

• Writing

• Making people laugh with my really bad jokes

I know some of you may be thinking, “Why should I help others? I worked really hard to get to where I am and to know what I know now. I’m not just going to give it all away for free!” But here’s the thing, you’re not giving it away for free. Life is not a zero-sum game. You don’t lose anything because someone else benefited from you. While you may not see immediate results for your help, your generosity always comes back to you tenfold. Hoarding all your chips like Scrooge McDuck just makes you an asshole, and you’re not an asshole, right?

Some others may also be thinking, “Well, I don’t want to seem like I’m bragging by giving unsolicited advice! I’ll really look like an asshole then!” There’s a difference between offering help to just anybody walking down the street and helping those who are clearly in need. I’m talking about the latter. Ever fall flat on you face only to open your eyes and see that there was already a helping hand reaching out to pick you back up? You’re not bragging. You’re not showing off. You noticed someone was in need of help, and you offered a helping hand. You’re not an asshole. You’re a freakin’ super hero.

All I’m saying is whenever you see a friend in need, reach out a helping hand and see what you can do. It doesn’t have to be much, but a little bit goes a long way. We all know that. You didn’t get to where you are today all by yourself, did you?

There are two types of people in this world as we continue building our castles in the sand. There are those who sit back and relax as soon as they get their castles built, and those who view their success as an opportunity to help others build their castles as well.

What kind of person do you want to be?

I hope you’re not the one who will just sit back as soon as you have yours. I understand; it’s not your problem, it’s theirs. But I’m a firm believer that one’s success is your success, and another’s failure is also your failure. We’re more connected than you realize. And believe it or not, the person who is greedy and hoards all his knowledge and resources always gets his castle knocked down first. Don’t ask me why. The world just seems to work that way.

And for those of us who are in need of a little help; I understand, we all have big egos, and we’re all quite wary of admitting we are a little lost. However, the first step in making any sort of progress is admitting that you are indeed lost. When you have the courage to do so, lo and behold, there will be a helping hand reaching out and ready to pick you right up.

Ultimately, I’m a firm believer that if you’ve had the opportunity to acquire knowledge that could be of benefit to others, then it is your duty to give back and make sure you share that knowledge with as many people as possible.

So, what skills do you have? And how can you best utilize your skills to help someone navigate their life today?

This is why I write this blog. I want to help you navigate your life. I want to help you reach the highest version of yourself by sharing the knowledge I’ve gained in this great journey of ours, and I hope it inspires you to do the same.

by Jason Lam

10 SKILLS YOU'LL NEED TO KICK LIFE IN THE FACE

1) Forgiveness. This skill alone will get you through 99% of the shit you'll come across in your life, and no I don't mean just saying the words "I'm sorry" - I mean to internalize it, to take on a forgiving spirit - once you learn how to do that, the words "I'm sorry" will feel like nothing. Give others a break, give yourself a break.

2) Find love, but also let yourself be loved. Love isn't just flowers and rainbows all the time, it's sacrificial, it's painful, but it's the good kind, like the kind you feel when you're lifting weights. Let's be honest, nobody loves lifting weights, it sucks, but you know that investing yourself in such a relationship will reap numerous rewards. That's love. Get that in your head now so you don't freak out every time you encounter a "problem" or "argument".

3) Believe in yourself, but really it's about believing in others. Our worlds are interlinked whether you like it or not, one's failure is your failure, another's success is your success. This is another way of saying don't be greedy. This is also another way of saying that when you feel like you can't accomplish anything, trust that you have people all around you just dying to give you a hand.

4) Pay attention. Become a good listener. In fact, become the best listener, because it isn't just about the physical act of sound waves entering your ear and neurons buzzing back and forth for your brain to process a simple, "oh really?" - It's about acceptance, and accepting people for who they are is one of the greatest gifts you can give in this world. (It makes people feel awesome! Don't you like to feel awesome?)

5) Learn the art of not caring. As I'm writing this we've just entered the year of 2014 and I have never been bombarded by so much useless information ever in my life. Laptops, iPads, iPhones, Television, Twitter... social media and technology has presented us the most wonderful gift with the ugliest side-effects. The reason I say this is because the more you pay attention to things that don't really matter, the more you compare, and the shittier you'll feel. Don't let it get to you. Keep your life simple. You're already unique. So really it's about being comfortable with who you are, wherever you are. Tell your parents you learned that from a 25 year old kid who spent too much time soul-searching and not enough time working on his career.

6) Stand for something. I know it's cool now to be all accepting of every single little thing but that doesn't mean you have to LIKE everything. That doesn't mean you can't express a highly educated, well thought out OPINION. Don't get lost in the mix.

7) Find your tribe. I'm not going to say the word network because it's overused and comes with a million negative connotations but I am going to tell you to build a constructive community. Really. You can only go so far by surrounding yourself with the same people. Reach out, but stay humble.

8) Hard work beats talent any day. That said, find your passion and have enough discipline to focus yourself. A jack of all trades is a master of none.

9) Know yourself. Really know yourself, which is really just another way of saying - buy a one way ticket out of the country and get on with that soul search - you'll be surprised with the things you'll find - it's an experiment - home was the control - now let yourself go.

10) Get off the computer. 

by Jason Lam